If you’ve talked to me in the past few months, chances are good that I’ve probably told you about this book:
Playing Big by Tara Mohr
What I love about this book is that Mohr covers so many of the common roadblocks women face when it comes to getting the careers they want.
She not only tackles dealing with fear but also receiving praise and criticism and undoing the good-student behaviors that hold back many women.
Throughout the book, I saw how several of these things held me back in my own journey. I especially resonated with what Mohr had to say about the way women communicate.
She explains the variety of “little” ways that women diminish what they say because they want to be nice and not hurt anyone’s feelings.
According to Mohr: “These ‘little things’ are attempts to walk the fine line of saying something without coming on too strong, but in fact they convey tentativeness, self-doubt, or worse self-depreciation.”
In the book, Mohr provides a great list of 10 things women tend to say that undermine their communications.
The three I’ve noticed the most in myself and my clients?
Just: “I just need… “
Kind of: “I kind of think…”
Does that make sense?
In my own life, I’m starting to see the results from implementing some of her ideas, especially when it comes to communicating. For example, I’ve been catching myself saying, “Does that make sense?” and I’m learning how to be more direct about what I really want instead of worrying about what others will think about it.
And when I hear my clients say things like, “I kind of want…,” I gently ask them to clarify what they really want so that they are declaring “I want…”
If you are a woman, now is the time to check this one out.
It doesn’t matter which stage of life you’re in. This book will help you discover what it could look like to be driven less by fear and more by confidence.